Friday, 8 February 2013

15 More Signs He's a Douchebag (With Visuals!)

One source of continual amazement to me is how people end up reading my blog. I don't have facebook or twitter, so the fact that I have had a pretty good amount of hits on my blog is pretty surprising. The traffic, it seems, comes mostly from one of life's biggest questions:

How to tell if he is a douchbag.

I stand by my original theory (found on this post) that if you have resorted to a google search to determine if someone has a pretty major character flaw, you are in a really desperate place in your life. Or you're not very good at listening to your gut, friends, parents, bodega owner, or therapist. Look at these stats, taken directly from this blog's statistics page.

Traffic Sources : Key Search

signs he's a douchebag 5306

signs of a douchebag    2953

signs he is a douchebag  893

how to know he's a douche  421

he is a douche  399

signs he's a douche  237

unfit to advise  224

douchebag signs  202

signs he is a douche  116

signs of a douche 97

A whopping 97% of top traffic on this site has something to do with people searching for answers about their douchebag boyfriend. Over ten thousand people have searched about douchebags and have ended up on this page in the last 15 months. You've got to be fucking kidding me.

I am going to make this as clear as I possibly can for you, so let's work with some visuals.

If he takes FB pictures of himself like this:

If he wears anything remotely like this:

Pays someone for this more than once every five years:

Styles his hair like this:

Or possibly this:

Enjoys beverages anywhere in this realm:

Ever, EVER poses like this for a picture:

Continues to wear this:


and this:

thinks this combo is great:

thinks this guy is "the shit":


makes you feel like you have to look like this:

has ever done this:

confuses having this with having done something good in life:

And finally, addresses anyone as "bro" or "boss" and/or uses the word "gnar", which means he is probably wearing something like this:

and this:

He is a douchebag.

I hope this helps.

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